Accountability!

I meant to get on here last week and tell all of my 3(!) followers that YES, Y.E.S. indeed, I did go out and order the two savings bonds for my cousins' kids!

I can't tell you how accomplished I felt walking out of the bank with the "my copy" as proof that I had gotten that little chore done. I did it on Friday so I not ONLY accomplished my task, but I also did it within the TIME FRAME that I set for myself. Its the little things people! And its allllll about the accountability.

Now, off to worry about something else that my seriously Type A self can come up with!... Like, maybe the extra 10lbs of baby "love" that just WONT. SEEM. TO. LEAVE. MY. BODY. ;o)

Random thoughts for the day.

I really wanted to write something totally perplexing tonight - but given the sleep deprivation, I'm finding that my thoughts are in short sentence fragments.

These are some of the random thoughts that have crossed my mind today... Enjoy the randomness that follows...

I'm convinced that I'm addicted to chocolate Entennman's donuts - so much so, that our kids KNOW that if they even TOUCH the box they are in DEEP trouble! They are known as "E*s special donuts"... Confession: some days I have 2!

...Which immediately leads to THIS thought: the extra 10lbs of baby *love* that has highjacked my waistline is OVER staying its welcome!!! It really doesn't help that I crave carbs ALLLL day long? That I never feel full? or that I eat cookies like I'm 12! And NO, I'm not exaggerating. I literally baked a whole batch of chocolate chip cookies the other day JUST for myself. Its quite ridiculous. Oh, and GUESS WHAT? Its girl scout cookie time... Uggggg I will be adding an additional 10lbs to the current 10lbs of baby *love* and will basically NEVER wear a bathing suit again at this rate. *SIGH*

Another random thought: Before I had Miller, I was OBSESSED with plucking my eyebrows... it was pretty serious! (just ask my sisters!) Sitting at a stoplight was my FAVORITE time to pluck away - the lighting was/is ALWAYS perfect (trust me on this!). Welllllll, SINCE Miller's arrival - my eyebrows look like a blonde catepillar convention! This pains me!

How about THIS one: True confession: for 1.8 seconds today when I was pulling into my driveway, I *thought* about life with a minivan... EEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK! Don't panic my faithful 3(!) blog followers! I snapped out of it at the 1.9 second mark - but WHEW! Close one! At that thought, I IMMEDIATELY ran into the house, up the stairs, threw open my cabinet, got out my tweezers and WENT. TO. TOWNNN. on THOSE hideous eyebrows for a full 20 minutes.... MUST. FIND. ELAINE. UNDER. THIS. MESS. PRONTO. SHES. LOOSING. HER. MARBLES.

(7 feet of blonde eyebrows later)

The world looks more like I remember it - and the baby seems excited (thus the photo above!) to see that his mother has eyes again! Whew... a WIN-WIN!

Things I'm wrestling with...

These are some of the thoughts that I've been wrestling with during midnight feedings...

It bothers me when people insinuate that I "just" became a mom 10 weeks ago. I've been a parent for 5.5 years - yes, it's different now, BUT I've been a "mom" for some time. I have 3 kids - not 1! I wonder if people would think the same thing if I had 2 adoptive children, and then had Miller? Wrestle.

When I say I'm going to do something, its REALLY important for me to do it - its about integrity for me. I told my cousins I was going to get their children $50 savings bonds over a year ago and I haven't done it yet... and it REALLY bothers me. I doubt they have given it any thought at all, but I beat myself up over it on a REGULAR basis. So much so, that I have a goal to get it done THIS week! (I'll keep you posted.) Wrestle.

I want to be a more generous person - like my husband and my grandmother. I want to give to people as SOON as God tells me to give them something. My goal is to be more obedient to His voice. Wrestle.

I'm so Type A that I often get lost in the "put things where they belong" mode. I think this secretly drives my husband and children crazy. In the long run, having the "stuff in its place" probably doesn't really matter? I mean, I want my house to be in some kind of good order, but more importantly(!), I want my kids to remember me as a genuinely loving parent - one that allowed for mistakes to be made and yet, fun to be shared - not a clean house freak. So what if they left their game on the table or their craft stuff out? I really want to make memories they will cherish, not rules that pester the crap out of everyone? I contemplate this A. L. O. T. -- Type A style! Wrestle.

I want Molly, Mack and Miller to be known by others as children that are compassionate for others. I want them to be known as the "kids that can play it forward". I pray that every day for my kids - I ask God to help them make good, Godly choices that they can play forward and see how it affects themselves and others around them. What are ways that John and I can facilitate that?... Wrestle.

There is so much about life that I have contemplated lately - not just because Miller was born, but because I've actually HAD time TO think (thank you midnight feedings!)! God has revealed things in myself that I need to work on in order to be all that He has called me to be!

So, if God's called me to be a stay at home mom/wife, I want to do it well! I want to be known as a mother of 3 kids, not 1... a woman of integrity... who is generous... yet, somewhat neurotic and type-A - but not so much that my kids wish I take meds!... and I want to be a woman of compassion so my kids have a good example to follow. I have alot of work to do - but I'm believing that God's called me to these things for a reason. ;o)

Miller's 1st MLK day.

Today, Miller and I had to go to my dentists office. Its about 40 mins from our house.

While Miller is a realllly good baby, hes not a huge fan of long car rides yet. So about 1/2 way there he started getting a little fussy - so, we talked! The topic: Martin Luther King and why we celebrate a day just for him. He instantly stopped fussing and just listened!

While I talked, and Miller listened, I too reflected on how monumental Mr. King was for our country. What an incredible legacy he left behind. What I love most about his legacy is that he was truly a man of great love. He had a love for ALL people, not just one race.

I believe that God gave that incredible man a dream. He obeyed God. If we all acted out the dreams that God gave to each of us, instead of living out of fear - I believe that this world would be A MUCH better place.

Just something to think about!

A New Year... A New Life!

Wow! It's hard to believe that the last time I posted a blog on here was OCTOBER 2009? How did that happen? Where did the time go?

Let's see if I can do a quick recap...

Mission Trip to Haiti, photography classes, photography business, a trip to Turks and Caicos, a dear friends wedding in Mexico, another wedding in New Jersey... Oh -- and this little thing called a BABY!!!!! ;o)

On November 11, 2010, I gave birth to Miller Jameson Bahr. He was 6lbs 10oz, 21 inches and precious! No, like LITERALLY P.R.E.C.I.O.U.S.! He's the BEST thing that I've ever done with my life.

People told me time and time again when I was pregnant that "its a love like no other." I shrugged. But It's SOOOOO true. There is absolutely NOTHING like a love you've ever experienced before. A love so strong and deep that it has scared me to death. I can't even begin to describe it, but I've heard it said like this before: "it feels like your heart is outside of your body". Its true.

Its a wonder that Miller has any skin left because I've practically kissed it off!! I'm totally, completely, and passionately in love with this new role that God has called me to.... Being a "Mommy".

I'm praying that God will continue to impart wisdom and discernment to John and I as parents. Not only for Baby Miller, but especially to Molly and Mack as we go from a family of 4 to a family of 5! This "blending" is such a delicate dance - and its one that I've prayed about for many, many years.

2011 is upon us, and I'm hopeful that the blessings will be many and that the wisdom and discernment will abound!

Cheers!